It is now one moment before midnight on Cailean’s 20th birthday, and as John has hoped, Miami with Walker , as a key player has won! All the angels in heaven, with Cailean as their point guard, are celebrating!

As his teenage years progressed, Cailean and I shared a mutual love of all things Boston Celtics and also the many joys of playing and watching basketball. It is very unsettling to watch another NBA playoffs without him. This year’s Miami’s team has become “our team” of choice because Cailean Walker’s favorite player – Antoine Walker – is in the finals, even if not with our beloved Celtics. It occurred to me the other night that Miami and Antoine and Cailean might actually celebrate a championship if they can win today on the evening of his 20th birthday. I will try to be stoic regardless of the results but do hope the 2 “WALKERS” prevail.
Two years ago on May 12, I drove home from work after a troubling day due to the tragic death of Nicholas Berg in Iraq. As the car went up our driveway into the woods, I looked up and saw our basketball hoop. It was then that I said to myself “oh good, Buddy and I can play some hoops ” – just before I rounded the bend and saw the 12 cop cars with their lights flashing. This evening I will watch the game on tv but my heart and mind and hopes and disappointments will first rest on that lonely hoop in the driveway where the real games took place. If only we could be out there again. love, DAD. 6/20/06

Today would have been a milestone for Cailean – he would have turned twenty. I often try to picture how he would look at this age. His friends have all matured and developed into wonderful adults over the past two years. Cailean would have been so handsome and would have been a remarkable young man.

I bought a birthday card for Cailean yesterday, wrote him a letter, and left it in a special place. I also sang an off key version of “Happy Birthday”, (including my father’s last line); I trust that Cailean was there to share and, perhaps, laugh at that moment. One of my messages that I included in my note to him was that hope is what is getting me through these very tough times. I’ve recently come upon a few quotes on this topic – their authors are unknown: “Hope is grief’s best music.” “Grief is the price we pay for love.” We are all grieving today for Cailean Walker Sheeran.

Happy Birthday, Cailean. Love forever and a day, Mom