Cailean's Requiem

CAILEAN – HERE, THERE, AND EVERYWHERE

Parents — Tue, 24 Nov 2009 21:07:03 +0000

It is hard to believe that we are facing our sixth Thanksgiving without Cailean. I wish that I could say that it’s getting easier, but that would not be true at all.We continue to mourn his loss and life continues to present many challenges each and everyday. My heart is indeed broken; trying to celebrate holidays is definitely not an easy task.

I feel fortunate that I constantly feel Cailean’s presence and spirit. He is always present in my heart, soul, and mind. His picture is in every room of our house. As I travel to work each day I pass places where Cailean spent happy times – on the way to West Point I pass a restaurant where he worked, his high school, and on post, several buildings that were very familiar to him. On the way to school, I drive by the country club where Cailean played and worked. In school I go out of my way to pass two pictures of Cailean that are hanging in the hallway – just to say hello.

This year I’m sure that Cailean would have been very grateful for two new family members. He would have warmly welcomed and loved his first niece, Tatum, and his future brother-in-law, Joe.

On Thursday I will give thanks to family and friends who continue to remember and honor our dear and kind Cailean. I’ll also give thanks for the memories of happier times.

ON THE EVE OF CAILEAN’S TWENTY-THIRD BIRTHDAY

Parents — Fri, 19 Jun 2009 17:44:48 +0000

�Always be just a little kinder than necessary� are words I noticed on a huge billboard as we drove through Watertown, MA on our way to participate as part of the �Cailean�s Walkers� group in our fifth annual NAMI Walk on Sunday, May 31, 2009. This quote from James Barrie, author of Peter Pan, struck me as being an appropriate theme for a day in which over thirty people gathered to honor our son, brother, and friend to many, Cailean Walker Sheeran.

The words certainly applied to Cailean, a gentle, kind, funny young man who loved to have fun and make other people happy through his wonderful music, funny sense of humor, and positive personality. On the eve of his twenty-third birthday, I can only assume that all of his attributes would have carried him very far in life and as a husband and father.

The quote also fits Brittany and Joe who opened their home to overnight guests and who also hosted some wonderful barbeques for the walk participants at their home over the weekend. Additionally, it describes those who walked as part of our team, many of whom traveled many hours to be able to join John, Brittany, and me : Ben, Bill, Bobby, Cathy, Chastity, Christine, Dana, Danny, Diane, Dylan, Debbie, Dylan, Erica, Graham, Gillian, Judy, Joe, Kathy, Maris, Melissa, Mike, Pam, Raquel, Rebecca, Richie, Ryan, Tammy, John Sheehan (separate from John Sheeran).

Others were also kind in giving, soliciting, or sending donations, many of whom are already listed as walkers above. Donations to NAMI were also given by: Mary Ehler, Amy Dowd, Anonymous, Nancy Lee, Dolores and Alan Norton, Robert Travis, Barbara Swartzwelder, Brion Travis, Margaret Yonco Haines, and Cynthia Timmerman. We were recently notified of donations given by John and Penny Seekircher and Kathryn Plummer in Cailean�s Name for the Lyme and Tick-Borne Diseases Research Center at Columbia University Medical Center. There were many others who wished that they could be there; they sent their thoughts and wishes to let us know they would be thinking of us on this heart wrenching, but yet heart-warming, day. We hope to post a group photograph of the NAMI walk shortly.

We would like to express our sincere gratitude to all listed above and to everyone who continues to remember and honor the very kind Cailean Walker Sheeran.

Happy Birthday, Cailean – you are always in my heart and thoughts. Love forever, and then a day, Mom

Missing Cailean for Five Years Now

Parents — Mon, 11 May 2009 20:33:08 +0000

FIVE YEARS GONE

dad — Mon, 11 May 2009 18:12:15 +0000

WHILE TYPING THE CAPTION, IT JUST OCCURRED TO ME THAT “FIVE YEARS GONE” WAS THE TITLE OF ONE OF MY FAVORITE JERRY JEFF WALKER ALBUMS FROM 1969 OR SO. WE GAVE CAILEAN HIS MIDDLE NAME WALKER TO HONOR THE MAN WHO INTRODUCED US TO THE WORLD OF TEXAS MUSIC AND THE CITY THAT IMBODIED IT, AUSTIN. FORTUNATELY,CAILEAN AND MAUREEN AND I VISITED AUSTIN 3 SEPARATE TIMES. IT SEEMS THAT SOME KIND OF COSMIC COINCIDENCE OR CONGRUENCE HAS OCCURRED. REGARDLESS, I WANT EVERYONE TO KNOW HOW UNFAIR ALL OF THIS IS AND WAS. CAILEAN WALKER SHEERAN WAS A GODSEND! BLESS YOU BUDDY AND KEEP ROOTING FOR THE CELTICS. LOVE, DAD.

A Heart Warming Story on a Beautiful Winter Day

Parents — Fri, 16 Jan 2009 20:16:56 +0000

Little did I know that stopping by a small store in Highland Falls would bring a conversation that was to warm my heart and soul. After completing my sales transaction and just as I was about to leave the store, J., the salesperson, remarked that I looked familiar to her. I commented that I lived across the river in Garrison and asked if she was from Highland Falls. She replied in the affirmative, so I offered that perhaps she might have known our children who attended the local high school in that town. J.told me that she graduated from O’Neill High School in 2003. I replied that she might have known our son who would have graduated a year behind her in 2004. J. immediately exclaimed “Cailean”! She shared that he was always on her mind, how she spoke to him everyday, and always carried his picture around with her. J. told me how much she always had liked and admired Cailean – he was so nice and kind to everyone in school.

I always try to remain stoic when I talk about Cailean, usually to no avail. I started crying and J. apologized for making me upset. I told her that it was fine and how much I loved to hear stories about Cailean; that this, indeed, was a nice moment for me. Her words brought me solace at what has been a distressing time.

How wonderful to know that Cailean’s spirit and goodness lives on in the memories of family, friends, and even a stranger whose name I did not even know up to now ! As his mother, I was so proud and comforted to again hear how his life so positively touched the lives of so many others!

another Celtic season begins

dad — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 20:47:00 +0000

well Cailean, it’s hard to believe that another nba season has just begun, and, further, you are not here to enjoy it with me. it seems like last june’s championship is still resounding in my brain. fortunately, i saw 4 games in boston during the playoffs with brittany, joe and pam, etal and the celts won each one. each game made me remember all the times that you and i drove up to boston to see a game, especially in 2002 when they almost made the finals. they were some of my favorite moments ever. i thought that you would appreciate the fact that brittany and i both dedicated last season and our title aspirations to you right after kevin garnett was acquired. the first thing i did after they won the championship was think of you, my all time basketball buddy. they did it for you buddy, they did it for you. love, dad. p.s. here’s to the next one Cailean!

FOREVER YOUNG

Parents — Fri, 20 Jun 2008 19:39:28 +0000

Today marks Cailean Walker Sheeran’s twenty-second birthday. Unfortunately, for all of us, he will always be “Forever Young”. We can only imagine what his future would have been. As I noted in an earlier entry to this website, that although Cailean passed away at the young age of seventeen, he endured more pain in the last year of his life than anybody should ever have to. In a way that made him wise beyond his years. He absolutely tried to be the best son, brother, uncle, grandson, nephew, cousin, and friend during this time.

We wish to thank all who came to Boston on May 31 to join us in Cailean’s honor in this year’s NAMI Walk. Almost forty – veterans and newcomers � attended. We also wish to extend our gratitude to those who could not attend but sent their best wishes and/or donations. We appreciate the effort that everyone makes to be present – most are from out of town and travel many hours. Such an outpouring touches all of our hearts and we have to believe that Cailean was also there.

Watching the Boston Celtics win the NBA championship this week was very bittersweet. Cailean would have been so happy that his team had finally won! The last time they had taken the title was just days before Cailean was born on June 20, 1986. We have to believe that Cailean is cheering now!

This would have been the year that Cailean graduated from college. We congratulate his friends who indeed made this milestone or are close to it in academics or in the service. The new Coldplay album came out this week. They were one of Cailean’s favorite groups and to this day I feel a special connection with them as well (Chris Martin has an uncanny resemblance to Cailean at times). I think of our son during the song “Vive La Vida” – for a while Cailean did rule the world!

Happy Birthday, Cailean. Love Forever and a Day, MOM

Happy Birthday Indeed

Mariel — Fri, 20 Jun 2008 15:41:34 +0000

NAMI Walk Pictures

Mariel — Sun, 01 Jun 2008 16:16:20 +0000

Thanks to everyone that came out for the walk and for all the others that made donations. Here are some pictures from the day.

http://picasaweb.google.com/mattcornell/20080531Nami?authkey=dOhWqIagbP4

CAILEAN: FOUR YEARS AND COUNTING

dad — Wed, 28 May 2008 14:58:43 +0000

well Cailean, it’s now four years since you left us as your mother and father and sisters continue to experience the many facets of your ever resounding absence; the answer to the old rhetorical question ” but who’s counting?” is quite simply “we are, every day and week and month and year”…..
which is not to overlook another form of math: THE INCREASING LIST OF THE MANY THINGS THAT NEVER WILL BE versus THE LIST OF MANY THINGS THAT NEVER WILL OCCUR AGAIN. regardless, you continue to reside at the center of our everyday lives.
I heard a song on the radio the other day by Marc Cohn entitled ” Let me be your witness” which seemed to evoke the many ways in which you remain with us. Brittany and Mariel are your witness as they remember what it was like to have a brother who was so loyal and endearing. your mother is your witness as she remembers what is was like to always have a reason to give her love and support. Emma is your witness as she lays her head on the sofa in the tv room exactly on the spot where you used to do the same. your father is your witness as he now sits at the computer watching Celtic games on the tv while simultaneously checking the play by play stats on Yahoo sports for the game just like you did. and in the background, we can hear you endlessly playing that blues riff on the guitar as we all sit together.
this weekend, your friends and family will once again meet in Boston for another memorial walk as we honor your memory. which brings me to another song I just heard on the radio which was written and sung by Julie Gold. the song is entitled “Heaven” and it includes the oft repeated refrain ” I think I’ll go to heaven… heaven is in your eyes.” so very true Buddy every time we see your picture. thanks for being our son and brother. love, Dad. 5/28/08